The Delights of Local Ignorance [pt. III]


[Dude, what the hell is this shit?]

 

And so then this party of special types, people other people sort of enjoy referring to as nerds or weirdos or geeks because, really, they can’t make any sense of them, this party was coming into full swing as it were. One of the guys, a MMORPG head by the shirt of him, then belts out proudly to a group of semi-attentive bystanders:

 

–       Killed frigging 150 Orcs today if you can believe it.

 

Another person in that group just so happens to be with, improbably, the United States Air Force. Though he does not identify himself he indeed hales from the 12th Reconaissance Squadron near Marysville [California] where they truly know their enemies. He just piloted an RQ-4 Global Hawk UAV through the gentle skies of Afghanistan that very same day, on mission to take out a significant Al-Quaeda operative. This recon guy who has not been so recon at all today steps up in and says:

 

–       Nickel and dime, mofo. Took me down some 14 Afghanis today. Fucking Arabs.

 

A statement that is followed by stunned, real-time silence. In steps the third character, an almost comically bearded guy who is a level 53 night-elf but in flesh life works as a civil engineer, having graduated from U of Illinois Champagne in 2007 after having immigrated to the US in the hellacious year of 2003 from that very same Afghanistan. Being a civil engineer words or other forms of diplomacy are not his strong suit. He steps in up to the RQ-4 GH guy and, swaying and brawny, asks him:

 

–       Afghanistan eyh? Which city? Which city you motherless fuck?

–       Easy Ahmed, easy. Didn’t even know those troglodytes have…

 

The USAF man does not get to finish his legless, chauvinist comeback because the Afghani, who used to be a member of Theran’s equivalent of local Golden Gloves pride, has entirely decked him with a single, megamorph-knuckled haymaker. And in another second he is on top of him, pummeling hard as hellfire, you know, the missiles. The original MMORPG persona who has innocently instigated the whole incident by bragging about Orc-offing is waving potential wannabe mediators [and fist-fodder, given what types are attending this party, the sound-track of which is more or less shamelessly pilfered from WoW and EVE online and the like] is waving these potential interveners off, proclaiming:

 

–       Afghani guy versus actual, true-to-life USAF drone pilot.

 

Though he has just taken the man up on his word. And so then nobody intervenes or at least people stop pretending they are intending to intervene, which amounts to the same outcome: a merciless clobbering.

Later, when the party is over, people are driving home in their respective SUVs and Priuses, etc. to their 84 degrees warm walk-up appartments with a warm glow right there in their chest, thinking” now this USAF bastard really for once got what he had coming. Thinking the machine finally got its due. Think this shit not understanding at all or even one bit their part in the complex play. 

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About tmabona

writer, reader [bolano, DW, bellow, deLillo], runner, badmintoneer
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